First Things

Following a Three-Mile an Hour God

I know it sounds kind of creepy, but I’ve always had an acute awareness of my own mortality.  It’s not that I’m always thinking about death.  But the idea that I will one day take my last breath has always been very real to me.  This is both a blessing and a curse.  It’s a blessing because it keeps me grounded and keeps me intentional about the stuff I spend my time on.  But it’s a curse because I speed through life making sure my bucket list remains short.  In the hurry of getting things done, I’m going too fast to see what’s really important.

Like Goose and Maverick, we all feel the need for speed. A fast-paced, high-productivity lifestyle defines American society.  But where it contributes to our prosperity as a nation it also exacts a cost at the human level.  To get more accomplished we clear room by pushing away those things that are eternally important.

Technology encourages impatience.  Today, a “reasonable amount of time” is measured in minutes and seconds rather than weeks, months, or years.  If we don’t get immediate satisfaction, we get agitated, give up, and look for a faster way.  If religion is the “opiate of the masses” then instant gratification has become its street meth.

But while we run through life at a dizzying pace, God is decidedly slow.

Jesus walked the earth.  He didn’t run.  He was in no hurry to get anywhere or do anything.  He was not slow as many understand slowness (2 Peter 3:8-9).  In fact, His pace often conflicted with the schedules of those around Him (John 7:6; John 11:32).  Guided by the eternal purpose, He set His own pace by the divine rhythm of His Father.

It’s the same with the things of God today.  While there are moments of punctuated progress, building relationships, spiritual growth, and engaging the world with the gospel of the Kingdom take no small amount of time.  When we approach the things of God at the same speed that we do most everything else in life, the effort will skew the result. It will have the appearance of godliness but will be void of His life.  

The Myth of Urgency

Some will point out urgency in the Kingdom.  They’ll tell you that people are dying everyday who will be separated from God forever.  They will say we need to do everything we can to stop the spiritual hemorrhaging and bring people to Christ as quickly as possible.  There are others who feel that positive change is not effective unless it’s perceptible in their ministries.  If they don’t see the needle moving they will take the wheel and try to speed things up.

In one sense, there is an urgency to our work.  But this assumes that saving people from hell is the only metric in play.  It assumes that the Kingdom only ever expands quickly.  For these I would point out what Paul told the Corinthians:

For we are co-workers in God’s service; you are God’s field, God’s building.  By the grace God has given me, I laid a foundation as a wise builder, and someone else is building on it. But each one should build with care. For no one can lay any foundation other than the one already laid, which is Jesus Christ.  If anyone builds on this foundation using gold, silver, costly stones, wood, hay or straw, their work will be shown for what it is, because the Day will bring it to light. It will be revealed with fire, and the fire will test the quality of each person’s work…

1 Corinthians 3:9-17 (ESV)

When urgency and mass production are used to drive the Kingdom’s expansion, the results can be disastrous.  You can easily end up with something like what we see in too much of the Western church today–a large population of spiritually shallow consumers.  Of course, the coming fire will reveal these things for what they really are.  (Even the small fires today reveal weakness and inadequacy.)  If we’re not working with the Lord, at His pace and timing, then we’re building with something other than Him.

Of course the opposite of an unhealthy understanding of urgency is spiritual lethargy.  With the colossal task of expanding God’s Kingdom looming before us we may decide we have no time for it.  We can remain merely consumers of a Life we’ll never use, return, or give away.  This isn’t good either.  

When we follow Christ we’re following a “three-mile-an hour God”.  To engage in His work requires us to walk with Him at His pace.  When we slow down He shows us life from His perspective.  We see things that we might not have otherwise seen.  We sense His movement and direction.  We live in the moment–undistracted by the stuff down the road.  While the world flashes by around us, we’re encouraged to tarry in a thousand places where the Kingdom intersects the world.

Jesus said, “Apart from me, you can do nothing” (John 15:5).  Our duty is neither to run ahead or lag behind.  Instead we “keep in step with the Spirit” (Gal. 5:25).  His pace is slow, steady, and continuous.  We keep pace by restraining our fear-based, fleshly compulsions and allow ourselves to be led by Christ under the subtle pressure of continuous intentionality.

The Sacrifice of Being Known

Jesus commands us to love:  To love God, our neighbors, and one another.  In fact, He calls these His greatest commandments.  But what does it really mean to love others?  

In a previous post we explored the various aspects of fully-involved, authentic love.  This is the kind of love that Jesus expresses within the Trinitarian Community.  It’s a love that He lavishes on His children and wishes to be accepted and returned to Him by everyone.  

Jesus’ love goes way beyond mere sentiment.  In some forms love can be shown to complete strangers.  But deeper and more tangible forms require familiarity with the beloved.  They require an authentic, ongoing relationship.  This would explain why so much of Jesus’ earthly ministry was spent being around others–at parties, at weddings, in close company, in the homes of friends, among the outcasts, among the religious elite, across cultural boundaries, and among the multitudes.  In fact, it was rare to see Him alone except to be with His Father.  By the life of Christ we are called to express His love to the world.  As with Jesus, the deeper our relationship with others, the more tangible and complete our love can be for them.  

How familiar are you with your neighbors?  

How well are you known by your work associates?  

How deep are the relationships you have with others amid the Community of the King?

If we’re honest, many of us Westerners find it difficult to enter into the kinds of relationships where Godly love can be expressed and shared.  Again, we live life at a pace that makes it impossible to engage in close relationships with those outside of our own nuclear families.  We’re too independent.  Some of us see the risks associated with exposure and vulnerability. These risks are too great to remove our “masks” and allow our true selves to be seen among others.  Maybe we’ve been burnt by friendships and see it safer to remain at arms length with our acquaintances.  For some the fear is less about knowing others more about being known–and allowing others to see our exposed souls. 

But we know that authentic love requires sacrifice.  To create the space God needs to express His love through us to others may require us to sacrifice our time, our vulnerability, or our comfort.  He is worthy of this sacrifice.

Hearing the Lord in a Documentary

Back in September, Jennifer and I attended a group retreat in eastern Kentucky.  Despite never having met with these people before, there was an instant connection.  It was two days of life together as a close-knit family of like-minded believers.  

As part of the retreat, we all watched a short video entitled Godspeed: The Pace of Being Known.  In this documentary Pastor Matt Canlis set out to learn what it means to slow down and come to know people in a way that allows authentic relationships to form.  Such relationships are the kind necessary for loving others the way Jesus does and allowing others to see Jesus in us.  

When I watched it the first time I was accosted by the thought that the Lord was directing me into a new season of life.  It was something I really needed to watch and listen to.  

Rather than give away all the details, I’ll invite you to watch it for yourself by clicking here.  It’s a little over 30 minutes long.  It’s very well done and well worth carving some time out of your schedule to watch.  I’d recommend you watch it before reading the rest of this post since it will give context to my comments.  

(Go ahead…  I’ll be here when you’re done.)

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After having watched this video several times, the following thoughts come to mind…

First, I can’t help but think that maybe what many of us have been taught about evangelism is simply wrong.  Maybe it isn’t about striking up conversations with complete strangers (with whom we have no other interest outside of their conversion).  What if it’s simply about building relationships with others so that Jesus can be seen and His love can be expressed.  What if it’s merely about following the Lord into whatever comes out of that relational dynamic?  

I’ve met several people in my life with an authentic gift for personal evangelism.  But sometimes I wonder whether some are driven to share Jesus by a guilt complex placed on them from an unhealthy emphasis of their church upbringing.  These churches put “winning others to Christ” as their highest calling.  Some will engage with others only to press the question of whether they’ll accept Christ (before moving on to the next target).  Honestly, I’m conflicted about these methods.  On one hand I would never deny what the Spirit has legitimately put on someone’s heart to do.  On the other hand there’s something about the low-commitment, low-relationship, salesmanship-like aspect of evangelism that rubs me the wrong way.  I often wonder what happens to strangers who say acceptance prayers led by street evangelism teams.

It seems to me that real evangelism occurs as we come to know our neighbors.  If we’re drinking deeply of the zoe life of Christ and pursuing Him first then He will find is way into that conversation.  As I’ve said many times before, Jesus presented authentically is incredibly attractive. He draws others by His glory and grace. Yes this is a slower process.  But at least in relationship with others there are opportunities for follow-up, fellowship, and discipleship to take place so that the seeds of the Kingdom have a chance to grow.

Jesus didn’t spend every moment of the day asking people pointed questions about his Lordship.  There were times when He pressed the question. But rather than being driven by a sense of urgency, He simply trusted in the guidance of His Father and in His arranging the circumstances for divine appointments.  Jesus had an agenda but he was working it in his own time.  He allowed his Father to arrange the circumstances.

Second, I think about how simple life must have been only two or three hundred years ago (and in many parts of the world today that we might consider “primitive”).  The idea of “leisure time” was probably unheard of.  Work wasn’t about professional fulfillment as much as it was about survival.  The demands of an agrarian society left little time for diversion.  The day started early and ended when the daylight ran out.  There was no internet.  Entertainment was very limited. 

But with all the toil, I imagine life was very satisfying.  Having no fruitless distractions ensured that we stayed close to our neighbors and invested in those relationships.  In all the mundane necessities of life, the still, small presence of our Lord could be continually felt throughout the day.  

We could certainly use some of that today.

Third, when the Lord calls us to engage our neighbors in a relationship, we rarely get to pick the type of person with whom we’d prefer to be with.  Some people make it a practice of surrounding themselves with acquaintances who look, act, and think the way they do.  It reminds me of those staged pictures you see advertising a church’s small group ministry.  (You know the ones I’m talking about.)

Instead the Lord may direct you to people with whom you have nothing in common.  Unlike our fictitious white utopian small group, people in real life aren’t hip and may not have it all together.  They might be messy.  They may not be pleasant to be around (at least not at first).  Some are rough around the edges.  They may be quirky and odd.  Some may have really bad habits or use phrases that make you feel uncomfortable.  They may not be the kind of people you would naturally gravitate toward.  (In fact, this may be the way others describe you.)  But they’re people created in God’s image.  All of them.  And Jesus wants to love them through you.

Fourth, was “the fear of being known”.  This idea struck a very deep nerve inside of me.  It was a mold that needed exposure to some light and fresh air.  

For a big part of my life I’ve been a pretty shy person.  I’ve done my best not to “stick out” or draw undue attention to myself.  This was one part humility and another part fear.  Being known meant sharing a part of my life.  It meant exposure, vulnerability, and the risks that come with authenticity.  It meant taking risks with others and the possibility of being rejected.  I didn’t want to be in a position where I had to project a consistent personality.  I didn’t want to be in a position of potential conflict.

I didn’t want to be known.  

Of course I had my excuses for avoiding personal relationships.   I would tell myself that I only have room for a limited number of deep relationships.  But not every relationship has to be on the deepest level to demonstrate love.  I’ve also conflated the frustrations with work with those whom I’ve worked with.  In doing so I sought to dehumanize of those whom Christ might seek through me.

Jesus lived in a fishbowl–everyone saw what he was doing and saying.  Comfort zones are comfortable.  But as followers of Christ, we’re all called to the same fishbowl to shine brightly among those around us (Matt 5:14-16).  This grinds against every fiber of my flesh.  But it’s an inflection point about which I’m being led to pivot.

Turning Intentions into Action

There are two groups of people whom I’ve allowed to fully know me.  One group is my nuclear family.  My wife and kids have seen my best, worst, and everything in between.  The other group is those among whom I spend in fellowship with the Lord.  But given everything I’ve learned, I’ve decided to take some intentional steps to slow down, watch, listen, and allow myself to become known within other circles.  This isn’t for the purpose of “personal evangelism”, but simply so that Christ can be seen and so that I can better love my neighbor.  

I see this happening on three fronts.

First, I’m going to make a concerted effort to get to actually know my neighbors.  We’ve lived in this neighborhood for almost 10 years.  I’m only somewhat acquainted with maybe three families (one across the street, one next door, and the other at the other end of our street).  By “getting to know” them, I’m not talking about being an overbearing nuisance.  But I’ll probably knock on their door, introduce myself, and ask them when would be a good few minutes to talk just to get to know them.  I would also want to put them at ease and let them know that I’m not “selling anything” (since people who knock on random doors and want to talk have a reputation for that.)  If they’re not there, I may want to leave a note to get back with them.  Not sure how this will be perceived, but I’m frankly getting too old to care.

Second, I want to try to be more open, more accessible, and more “myself” at work.  This is going to be difficult.  Throughout my career I’ve always projected a very work-oriented persona.  I’ve never had time for idle chit chat and building relationships.  I’ve also been very cautious to keep my flesh on a short leash.  But along with all those precautions I’ve also suppressed my spirit and even my personality for fear of offending.  As a result, I’ve never been able to be myself in the workplace.  I pray that the Lord would remind me of the freedom He has granted me to be blissfully disconnected from my “work persona” so that He can be free to do what He does through me.

Third, I want to make those random interactions in the “in between places” a little more meaningful.  By the “in between places” I mean those micro-conversations with the cashier at the checkout, those providing services, and others you bump into in public.  I recognize the interaction can’t be deep. But sometimes it’s enough just to recognize them as fellow humans and interact with them in a kind way. In the churn of life it’s far too easy to see others merely as a “function” they perform.  We can see them as “those who hand us fast food, deliver our mail, and stock the aisles”, forgetting that they’re people with responsibilities, interests, and problems of their own.  They need to be reminded that they’re more than the service they’re providing. 

I remember several months ago my wife and I were eating lunch at a local restaurant. I felt compelled to ask the waitress if there was anything we could pray for her about.  Far from being offended, this young lady let us know that she was dealing with some relational problems and was concerned about her son.  We prayed with her on the spot.  I know that this can make some folks uncomfortable.  But in general, I’m learning that the average person is a whole lot more friendly than I am.  I’m learning that I’m the one that needs to loosen up and interact with those who God loves.

I covet your prayers as I exert the subtle pressure of continuous intentionality in these areas.  I’ll be praying for you as well.